13 Adventures in 2013

February 16, 2013 By Kimberly

I don’t know about you, but I want each year to be bigger and better than the last.

What would be your adventures?

In your relationships? With your business? At work? For your personal life?

C.S. Lewis said, “You are never too old to set a new goal or to dream a new dream.” I’m never short on goals or dreams! In fact, I like to call them adventures, because the connotation is much more positive than the word “risk.” So here I’ve dreamed up 13 adventures for 2013.

Mentor a teenager in the foster care system. Did you know that thousands of kids “graduate” from the foster care system every year? At the age of 18, it’s off to the real world. And who is to support them? Who is to help them with job applications? Who can they turn to when they have questions about rent or college or dating or cooking? My heart is for these teens who are often unprepared and alone.

Take a nearby mission trip with my children. Over the summer, I’d like to pack up the kids, hook up the pop-up camper, and travel to another state. We’ll stay at a campground for a few weeks, but several times a week work alongside an existing ministry or organization. Perhaps we’ll read stories and teach art lessons to underprivileged children. Maybe we’ll work every night at a soup kitchen. Who knows! The fun will be in encouraging the whole family to participate in the planning process.

Go parasailing.

Take a 3-day backpacking and camping trip with the family. I’m not talking about the pop-up camper. I’m talking matches, sleeping bag, lantern, backpacks, and whining kids who ask, “When are we gonna get there?” as they traverse hills and rocky paths.

Acknowledge and praise people more often. Adventurous? Yes, for me.

Start Sunday Family Meetings. Goals for the week? Check. What’s going well? Check. What to work on? Hmmmm. Could be rough waters ahead.

Tempt the swing. Swing dance, that is. Here in my hometown, locals gather to swing dance. I tried it once last year, failed miserably, but am determined to learn. And this time, I’m forcing hubby to go with me. That should be an adventure in itself!

Got 4 little kids at home. Just got me one awesome dog. Had a great idea: Why not create a little chaos at the nursing home? Many elderly folks love kids and dogs. They remind them of their own grandkids or pets they had long ago. Plus, my kids could use a little lesson in empathy and service to others.

Help my children to identify ways they can help others, and then walk alongside them as they implement their ideas. (Example: sell cookies to raise funds for a child with cancer.)

Write a book.

Create a 5-year financial plan. (Is this adventurous or scary? I don’t know.)

Turn Bible verses into personal prayer petitions for myself and those I love.

Make new friends! Reach out to 10 women who inspire me. Ask them to lunch.

Now, it’s your turn. What would be your list of 13 adventures for 2013? Share one of them in the comment box below. I’d love to hear your ideas.

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Are You Bottled from the Source?

October 11, 2012 By Kimberly

I fondly remember a client who frequently told me and the other women in my coaching program that she was “bottled from the source”—in other words, made in the image of God.

I can’t think about her without a smile on my face, because she is one of those who lights up a room, encourages the heart, and inspires the soul. I can’t help but guess that her joy comes from knowing she was made for a purpose.

Are you bottled from the source?

And if so, what are the ramifications of such powerful knowledge?

I’ll admit. I stand high atop my platform on this very issue—that fact that you have been bottled from the source, and yes, with that comes not only great blessing but also great responsibility.

First, if you’re made in the image of God, then how can you not succeed? I’m not talking about your ability to achieve anything and everything. I’m talking about knowing that if God has led you down a certain path, He will provide the resources for your journey.

Second, you are not alone! He is always with you—comforting you, guiding you, disciplining you, and blessing you.

Third, you were created to do a grand work. Should you be a Martin Luther King Jr. or a Mother Teresa? Why not? Or better, why not be who you were designed to be? I am convinced that we all long for a deep sense of meaning and contribution to this world. What is yours?

And finally, if you’re bottled from the source, you’ll never go thirsty.

Think about that.

5 Ways Prayer Can Transform Your Life

August 28, 2012 By Kimberly

Coffee and prayer. Like cookies and milk. Simplicity and perfection wrapped up together. Most of my mornings start out with a read from the Bible or devotional, a hot mug of coffee, and quiet time spent in prayer and reflection.

Not always, but most.

I have not always been the best pray-er—too busy for God, too tired for an honest one-on-one, too frustrated from the daily complications of life. But over the last two years, I have tried to make prayer a priority. And the more I’ve incorporated prayer, the greater peace and sense of purpose I’ve had. Specifically, I have discovered that prayer can transform lives in at least five ways:

Prayer humbles us.

It’s all about me. You knew that, right? Oh wait. I bet it’s all about you. We all have a tendency to believe this way, even if we don’t say it outright. Think about it. How many times in a conversation do you say the word “I?” I bet all our thoughts somehow relate to us, right? Or am I the only one?

I love how prayer humbles us. When I pray, I pray for my children, my extended family, my business associate who has cancer, my neighbor who just had back surgery, the impoverished of my city. Prayer humbles me when I reflect on others: their desires, their needs, their hurts, their stumbling blocks. Prayer offers me a way to get beyond myself to others, and to what really matters most.

Prayer engages us.

Prayer engages me to my Father. When I ask my kids, “Would you think that I loved you if I never spent time with you? If I never spoke to you?” Of course the answer is “No!” It’s the same way with prayer. When I pray, I am speaking to God. I am engaging with Him intimately. He is not distant. I can communicate with and relate to Him on a personal level. How freeing to know that I am so loved!

Prayer ignites us.

Prayer ignites reverence and passion. Prayer reminds me of not just His goodness and mercy, but His holiness. He inspires awe. Similarly, the act of a simple prayer produces passion—for His people, for His purposes, for Himself. Like a fiery spark that spreads, prayer stirs my heart in so many different life areas: my career, my relationships, my mission, and my values.

Prayer aligns us.

I admit I want to do things my way. I find that prayer, however, shifts my perspective to God’s perspective. His ways become my ways. His purposes become my purposes. Prayer aligns us to Him. When I don’t pray, I start walking away, taking the detour from the path God has laid out for me. When I do pray, I see how far I’ve strayed, and I can’t help but run back into His arms.

Prayer grows us.

Prayer isn’t just about speaking. It’s not a litany of requests or pleas for help. Prayer may be more about listening. Those who stop talking and start listening are those who learn and grow the most. God has so much to say back to us—if only we would shut our mouths and quiet our hearts. When is the last time you’ve set aside a substantial amount of time to not only talk but to listen?

He’s speaking to you. Are you willing to hear?

3 Limiting Beliefs That Victimize You

May 15, 2012 By Kimberly

Paul was confused, a pained grimace spread across his face. What did his wife ask again? Oh yeah—where he might find work. He didn’t know. Face it. Most laid off workers like himself didn’t seem to have an inkling where to find those “magic” jobs he kept hearing about. Something about the hidden job market. “Well,” he asked himself, “If the jobs are hidden, then how can I find them?” Paul turned away from his wife, ashamed that he didn’t know. Ashamed he couldn’t take care of his family. Ashamed he was helpless and stuck.

He is deceived. We all are. Sometimes. We are artists of self-deception, afraid to look at reality and take full responsibility for our lives. Some of the language we use points out our limiting beliefs—beliefs that keep us from living the life we’re suppose to live.

Do any of the following sound familiar?

I don’t have time.

In other words, I’m too busy to (fill in the blank). I think I say this every day! Recently, my daughter asked me if I could cuddle in bed with her for a few minutes. I told her I didn’t have time. What I should have said was, “I want to cuddle with you. I should cuddle you. But I have a project I have to finish tonight. You see, this project is due in two days and I have much more to get done. It’s much more important than a five-minute cuddle. You understand, right?” Well, perhaps I shouldn’t have said that. Nevertheless, essentially that is what I was telling her, right? Saying that we don’t have time for something is a fallacy because it presupposes that time is something we can acquire and control. No! Time is the same for everyone. It doesn’t change. What does change are our priorities. Consequently, this limiting belief keeps us from taking full responsibility of how we use our time and whether or not we honor the people and things that are most important.

If I’m successful, then I’m happy.

Significance far outweighs success. Perhaps you’ve acquired a great deal of what this world deems success—a beautiful house, a housekeeper to go with that beautiful house, fancy restaurants, a well-known reputation. Good for you! But there comes a time in all of our lives when we look at ourselves critically and ask, “Is this what I’m here for?” We were designed with a purpose. Have you found yours? Are you living a life of significance and meaning? The limiting belief that success is everything will crush a person’s very own spirit and soul.

I don’t know how to (fill in the blank).

I come across this limiting belief often in my coaching work. Unfortunately, we use this language as an easy way out. Whether it’s a business owner who says, “I don’t know how to increase my sales” or an executive who states, “I don’t know what the boss wants” or a husband who claims, “I don’t know where to find a job,” the fact remains the same: We are responsible for finding out. So you don’t know. I get it. Recently, I’ve been facing this scenario myself. I don’t know what to do regarding a particular business decision. Yet it’s my job to find out. So I’m doing my research. I’m asking those wiser than myself. I’m praying and seeking God’s direction. But I refuse to stay stuck.

Limiting beliefs pervade our thoughts. We speak them everyday—to ourselves, to others. You can discover a wealth of information if you look behind these limiting beliefs. It’s not easy nor pretty. And while confronting ourselves with the truth takes strength and humility, in the end we can arise not as victims but as victors.

20 Ideas for Random Acts of Kindness

April 10, 2012 By Kimberly

Recently in my group coaching program, The Year of Living Adventurously, my participants decided to declare our “Community and Impact” month a month for random acts of kindness. They decided that instead of focusing on their own personal goals for making a difference within the community, they would each focus on acts of kindness. Then we would get together to compare notes.

So what is the purpose of committing to acts of kindness? First, you will learn a lot about yourself. You’ll see just how difficult it is to step outside your comfort zone to meet the real needs of others. Second, you’ll realize that awareness is key to kindness. Thus, you’ll have to slow down, rather than allow your life to whiz by, without a thought to how you can impact others. You’ll also discover that generosity takes practice. As marred humans, we tend to be self-absorbed. Through these acts, your personal growth and development will flourish.

One of my participants said that this month changed her life. For example, she brought gourmet coffees to her co-workers on several occasions (they couldn’t figure out what was wrong with her). She wrote little love notes to her husband (he thought he was being harassed by some other woman!). These random acts of kindness helped her get outside herself and made a difference in the lives of those she touched. She, too, was blessed in return.

Do you want to know what kind of impact you make on others? Or can make on others?

Take on the challenge yourself.

If you’re ready to take on the challenge, here are some ideas. Again, the point, however, is that the acts are random. While some acts of kindness can and should be planned, you’ll also want to become aware to the world around you. When you do, you’ll see that there are endless opportunities to help your fellow human beings.

Ideas for Random Acts of Kindness:

Pick flowers from your yard and bring them to a neighbor.
When at a restaurant, pick up the tab of another patron.
You have to make dinner anyway, so why not make an extra serving or two and drop it off at an elderly neighbor’s house.
Empty your co-worker’s trash.
Clean the microwave at work!
Compliment a complete stranger.
Take a homeless person out to lunch.
In the grocery checkout lane, let the person behind you go first.
Buy chocolates for your grumpy boss.
Wash the outside of your neighbor’s windows.
Write a card for a friend you haven’t connected with in a while.
Make a list of ten reasons why you love your spouse/child/mother…Give it to them.
Listen deeply to the one who loves to ramble on.
Acknowledge the efforts of someone who works hard.
Write a thank you note to someone who has made a difference in your life.
Offer to mentor someone.
Have a real conversation with a homeless person.
Pick up trash in the parking lot.
Leave a note with an inspiration quote on car windshields.
Humble yourself and pray with someone about their challenges.

I suspect that if you commit to doing one act of kindness daily for a month, you will develop a new habit, which means you won’t have to try so hard. You’ll not only make an impact on the lives of others, but your life, too, will be forever changed.

Share your stories! What acts of kindness have you done? What was the impact? What things do you plan to do? Put your comments in the box below.